Beware the Dreadlord Tichondrius! For he and his mighty points of articulation (all whopping 14 of them) will warp you into a world of EVIL! And he’s not alone. Prince Arthas, then-paladin-now–death knight, is available to watch Tichondrius’ back. But fret not at the abundance of evil in Toycom’s lineup of WarCraft III figures. For a sweet dosage of good, get the comely/lithe/svelte Shandris Feathermoon, a joyously articulated Night Elf archer. For a mere $12 each, you can have an epic WarCraft saga right on your toy chest/mantle/cubicle—and a constant reminder of just how sad your adult life is. Once you’ve gotten over your lost pride, Toycom will be popping out another series of WarCraft-themed toys (as well as toys based on StarCraft and Diablo). They’ll be lurking at Best Buy, GameStop, CompUSA, and other geek shops.

Copyright © 2003 Ziff Davis Media Inc. All Rights Reserved. Originally appearing in Computer Gaming World.